Bobby Bradley blessed us with the best finger guns yet

Finger guns are an art form. Anybody can just pew pew to their friends after a big double, but it takes a certain pizzazz to make it interesting.

The draw time, the pews per second, the thrust of your first shot. It all comes together to make something truly special.

If there’s anything the Indians’ finger guns have been missing to this point, it’s raw, rookie excitement. Oscar Mercado looked pretty nervous with his first taste of the finger guns, but he’s not an outwardly anxious guy — at least not on the field. We’ve heard from his post-game interviews that he can occasionally be an emotional mess on the inside who looks to Francisco Lindor as a calming presence, but you wouldn’t know it by looking at him.

Bobby Bradley, on the other hand, wears his excitement on his sleeve. More importantly, he wears it on his finger guns.

The guy is nothing but smiles and he’s not afraid to take in the game as it comes to him. It’s a wonderful change of pace from the stern face most MLB players are meant to have. Bradley is different; he exudes personality. And for a big man like himself, it’s even cooler to see. He’s going to crush baseballs and love every minute of it.

All this leads to the title of this post, and maybe the best thing we’ve seen all season long. The ultimate finger guns.

The Assassin took a sixth-inning fastball to task and blistered it to the outfield at 110 mph, and he hustled right out of the box for a double — his second in two games and the first that stayed in the park.

And then he hit us with the guns.

Bradley’s draw time on those monsters was .36 seconds. Taking it in the context of the best Indians fingers guns ranked last month, it’s not exactly a fast draw time. He wasn’t going for speed, though — this was an authoritative finger gun draw. Bobby Bradley wanted you to know he hit a double, god damnit, and he’s ready to fire the shit out of some finger guns.

It might have been slow, but it’s by far the most enthusiastic, and as a result most fun, draw yet.

Once the guns are out and the fun has begun, Bradley takes a big step towards his dugout and pews his heart out. He starts with a massive ka-pow of a finger gun, sawed-off style, then once the lil’ pewers start firing he gets off, by my count, 10 shots in roughly half a second. That adds up to a pews per second (PPS) of 20.0 — one of the fastest documented finger guns of the modern era. He trails only Oscar Mercado, who pew’d at 27.3 PPS in his own debut.

Bobby Bradley is an artist, the diamond is his canvas, and finger guns are his brush strokes.