Hello, Mr. Ringer. Or can I call you The? Either way, you clearly need a crash course in the life and times of the Rare Dominican Goat, the Angry Hamster,
Boom Boom (never Boom Boom), or whatever else you want to call him.
Just know his name: Jose Ramirez.
The Ringer is a great sports and pop culture outlet, maybe my preferred alternative since the doom of Grantland. Until the inevitability of video-only content consumes the entire internet in a swell of loud hot takes, I’ll be reading the words of Michael Baumann, Ben Lindbergh, Claire McNear, and others on theringer.com until my eyes bleed.
But they seem to be really missing out on a baseball-pop sensation in Jose Ramirez. Or, at the very least, they refuse to acknowledge just how great he is. Not how underrated he is, not how unique he is — how great he is. Simple as that. Great.
First, in the days leading up to the All-Star game, Michael Baumann released a piece titled “The Utility Star,” in which he runs down why Jose Ramirez is a player “without a position” whose contributions don’t always “show up in the stats.”
That was, of course, wrong.
Baumann’s post is a glowing review of Ramirez’s overall ability, but the idea that his ability doesn’t show up in stats is ludicrous. He finished 2016 with a 122 wRC+, one of the best contact rates in the league, and a 4.8 fWAR. Those are stats. They are good. They show up.
Our own Matt Schlichting already ran down why labeling Jose Ramirez a utility player is a bonkers proposition, so I won’t focus on it too much here. Just know it happened, and just know it was an odd position for The Ringer to take, to say the least.
At least Baumann was speaking positively of The Angry Hamster in his piece. Even if we didn’t agree with his wording, at least he acknowledged how great Ramirez is. But a more recent post from the Ringer is downright disrespect. No two ways about it.
Congratulations, Boston, on acquiring the unquestioned champion of sprinting out of his helmet, Eduardo Núñez https://t.co/Yvb0arLccO— The Ringer (@ringer) July 26, 2017
Excuse me? Eduardo Nunez is a lot of things, I’m sure, but “unquestioned champion of sprinting out of his helmet” is not one of them. That title belongs to Jose Ramirez, and Jose Ramirez alone.
If you want solid numbers, the “unquestioned champion of keeping track of Jose Ramirez sprinting out of his helmet,” Zack Meisel, has your stinking numbers:
That's cute. Jose Ramirez lost his helmet 62 times last season, but, sure, Nunez is is "the unquestioned champion." https://t.co/jNQDi6BZEY— Zack Meisel (@ZackMeisel) July 26, 2017
There is no competition here. The author of the offending Ringer piece, Ben Glicksman, doesn’t even so much as mention Ramirez, who almost kicked his own helmet onto his damn head last season.
Instead, Glicksman focuses on the fact that Nunez straight-up cheats and wears a helmet that is too big for his head anyway. Ramirez doesn’t do that. His hair is just to amazing to contain under a helmet. This is a #fact.
And did I mention that Ramirez almost kicked his own helmet onto his head last season? Because he did. Some geniuses even made a shirt out of it (We did. We are the geniuses), and the Indians released a helmetless Jose Ramirez bobblehead to commemorate it.
Just look at this art in motion. Even if he didn’t lose his helmet 61 other times last season, this should be enough to crown him as king of losing his crown.
But, sure, Ringer. You keep disrespecting Jose Ramirez. It only fuels him. Soon he’ll be hitting more dingers, playing more third base, and losing more helmets. Maybe he’ll even block you on Twitter. Just don’t ever think you’ll get that cherished thumbs up @ you anytime soon.
I expect a full redaction and written apology, addressed to Jose Ramirez. But a simple Twitter like on this article will also suffice. You’re move, The.