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Soylent Green is People: The Stirring Finale

Everything ends poorly, or else it wouldn't end.

I choose to remember the good times.
I choose to remember the good times.
Hannah Foslien

Regardless of what happens on Wednesday, I am incredibly proud of this team.

Let's be honest, this is a little bit sad. I... I can't read through the comments sections from before the game. It was like going back and reading every text, note, and email you got from a girl, right on through the one she sent you letting you know it was over. (If your romantic tendencies swing towards men, just insert "boy" where I wrote "girl" and you'll get the idea.)

No; I'm strong. I can do this.

All I want for my birthday is an Indians playoff win!


*dissolves into tears*

Maybe I could move on if only I could pinpoint what exactly went wrong...

The Occam's Razor of baseball strategy there. We needed more runs than they got, and instead we had fewer. Still, I feel like it could have all changed so quickly. Maybe if I had found a video feed, or if I had worn my other lucky shirt, or if Turk's girlfriend had been amorous instead of absent...

These are all terrifying thoughts.

I know, both in the sense of wielding the power to change a game in the sense that I would invade Turk's privacy like that just because his girlfriend's kiss gave us the Giambi walk-off. Still, that's the edge you have to live on to be a successful fan.

Ah, the "fear" metric. It’s why Jim Rice is in the Hall of Fame!

Embrace the fear, Jason. Enough about baseball, though, let's get down to brass tacks. How did I do at the reins of the Soylent feature this season?

I give this season a solid A-

Thanks. Maybe I can come back even stronger next year, maybe throwing in some graphs, keeping a leaderboard, or holding a Q&A on Twitter.

I’d say this would go past "even stronger" and border on "unfair."

You're right. I don't want people to start thinking of LGT as "that site that does the Soylent Green feature" and forget about all the great work done by everyone else from Ryan on down. I do have in mind making a big addition as a co-author though.

I hope it means he's fat. The Tigers are fat, and they are really good.

That is a more-than-fair point. Anyone else have an opinion on my work?

This was a great year compared to what I hoped it would be.

Ouch. That's setting the bar pretty low from my own brother. Thanks a million, Brad. For the final green of the week before the long winter, let's turn to Turk.

Four things, mostly things that have already been said:

1. What a ride. We got so much more than we expected from this team, and I feel dumb for writing them off so many times. The future is bright despite some admittedly large question marks.
2. Thanks to Jay, Ryan, Jason, and everyone else who made this consistently the best sports blog and community on the web.
3. I’m fully behind the Rays from here on. Screw Boston and Detroit, obviously. Screw LA, even. Pittsburgh has won enough in other sports. I’m tired of hearing about Oakland pulling off scrappy seasons in a terrible division. St. Louis and Atlanta have both had more than their fair share. I want Price, Longoria, et al. to get theirs. But not Delmon Young. Let’s make sure he doesn’t get a ring.
4. Screw that clown who threw a drink at DeJesus. Super trashy. Also dumb. Drinks at the stadium are expensive! Doesn’t he have any idea how much less he makes than Chris Perez? You can’t just be throwing away $8 beers!

Absolutely true on all counts, but especially number two. I've always loved the Tribe, but my fandom reached a new level when I found this community. Thanks so much to Jay, Ryan, Jason, talonk, woodsmeister, Adam, Andrew (wherever he is, but always in our hearts), westbrook, Evan, and YDW for keeping great content on the front page every day. It seems weird to say as an Indians fan, but I'm actually looking forward to seeing what the team does this winter, and I know the crew here will keep me posted every step of the way. Here's the last of the rest of your week in green.

The good news is that I watched the game with a NY LGT contingent that included YoDaddyWags. I can confirm that he A) does exist; B) doesn’t disappoint; and C) can wear the hell out of a pair of striped pants and a red vest.

It was great meeting everyone.

That picture at the top of the article just breaks my heart.

I think it’s also worth mentioning Mickey Callaway as well. Who would have thought in March that starting pitching would be a strength of the team, let alone that Ubaldo would pitch like he has?

I love Ubaldo. No seriously, seriously, seriously, listen. Listen. Seriously, I’m serious. I mean I love him like seriously. Listen. Did you hear me? Like he is, I just love him. Seriously. I love you too man, but seriously, Ubaldo is seriously. I just love him. I love all you guys too. I’m sorry. I just love him. Seriously.

It’s how you spec the sarc font. Personally, I think sarcasm that needs its own font is a failed effort.

Considering he spent the first six years of his life wandering through the cavernous Municipal Stadium like some baseball baby Moses, it’s fitting Tito has led this team to the edge of the promised land.

free one year membership to LGT

I was careful to choose the timeframe and wording that makes the Tribe look best.

Albert Belle was the best punch runner according to Fernando Vina.

It’s hard for us to win it when they are all so fat.

Do not attempt to derail the narrative with logic. Logic is but a penny on the tracks.

Winter, as they say, is coming. There's no place I'd rather be for it than LGT.

I’d rather be surrounded by 42,000 screaming Clevelanders.

There's that, too. Godspeed, all.